"YOU. LOOK. SO. CUTE." - The proper way of a woman complimenting another woman

Happy Monday World !

Complimenting is an art!

Compliments are important because they are a way of expressing your opinion without making it all about you; at least it shouldn't be all about you and how YOU like his hairstyle, and how YOU like her smile and how YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU... Point made! It is YOU indeed who compliments, yet the content has to be about HER. Sometimes, expressing ones admiration towards another can become frustrating and we end up not saying anything, but...

One particular soft spot I have been noticing after interacting with thousands of people in my amazingly awesome career and superbly colorful social life (so modest this one!) is how a woman pays a compliment to another woman. Or, better said finding the art of paying SENSE-a-tional compliments without questioning whether you did a good job or the other person thought your admiration was, simply put, fake!

Complimenting someone is an art, and, like most other things in life, it takes practice and a little bit of time and thoughtfulness to pay the most SENSE-a-tional compliment in the history of YOU ;)

Here is part 1 of 3 thoughtful ways to address compliments coming to and from you:

1. The You Look So Cute Compliment

You Look Cute is an understatement for "I don't really care, but HEY! You look O.K. and I kinda have to say something without putting a large amount of effort into it, so I'll stick to 'You look cute'." If CUTE had a career in fashion, he would be fired by now. It just doesn't do the job when complimenting someone that you appreciate. It's lousy! It's vague! It's buy one and get 6 free! It lacks a sense of observation rather than being to the point as to what you really like about the other person. It's the difference between inertia and momentum- the later is with intention while the former just happens. There is something not quit right when a woman says to another woman that she looks cute; if you were to close your eyes and hear this you would most likely imagine two twelve-year-olds dressed up in a Halloween ballerina costume, brushing each others' hair up in the attic on a Friday night. 

There are so many other great compliments to chose from when replacing the implosive You Look Cute. One of the best ways to come up with compliments is being observant and to the point - it is within our nature to gravitate towards people who actually pay attention to us rather than being blunt, which is what You Look Cute is. If you like the way somebody looks or carries themselves start with "You have such a great sense of style!" or "Your style is amazing!" and build it up from there. It is about the art of conversation, being present, observant and honest, while understanding that looking cute comes from something that she is wearing, or the way she carries herself rather than it being a state in nature - no such thing as the natural state of cuteness.

Unless you are seven years old or are speaking to a seven year-old, the word cute screams jealousy! This word is overly used by women when it comes to complimenting a woman's appearance, and the last thing you wanna hear after spending three hours in the bathroom, flat ironing your hair and hair spraying half of the Schwarzkopf container, shaving your legs two times and redoing your eyeliner at least 4 times is that You. Look. Cute.  I am completely biased when saying that it lacks maturity and admiration, and you are free to come up with your won hypothesis to float your boat, however, when you start thinking about all the other rich, descriptive and empowering words you can use when complimenting a woman on her looks, cute starts to fade away into the abyss. 

If you really find something about the other woman that you categorize as cute, address that one thing in particular, and not the entire person. You can say things like :"That necklace is cute!", "Your hairstyle is cute!" or "Your belt is cute!" 

Otherwise, the magic formula is:

YOU + HAVE + SUCH + A + GREAT + SENSE + OF + STYLE ! 

Today's assignment is to use this formula on three amazing women you would normally find cute, and see how their way of interacting and conversing changes. 

Tomorrow we will be addressing the "I Love That Dress" compliment...

Stay classy and share this article with someone you find... cute :P !

oxx,
Andrina